My kids are Growing Up

The Summer is about wrapped up. I feel like we have been able to fit a lot in, and I hope to fit in even more before we go back to school. Oh...back to school. It used to be so simple. Who would have thought that just the simple act of sending your kids back to school would have feelings other than great joy correlated with it. It is not that way anymore. I have had so much anxiety around this than I would like to admit. I have had so many conversations with other mothers, I have been back and forth countless many times on whether or not I will send them back, but, ultimately, we landed on sending them. Kaj wants to go to middle school. I do not want him to go. Oh yeah...you wanted me to say that again, right? Middle school. I know. They start it in 6th grade here. So, my Kaj bears, is going to be in junior high. Rowan really wants to go to school, and Josh said he would do whatever Rowan wants to do. I would be fine if they chose to stay home too. I just don't feel great about any of it though. If I were to break into a percentage 🧐 probably 60/40 with wanting them to stay home and do home school, but it depends on the day, right. Ha! Sometimes it's 100% I want them to go! 

Lily started a little dance class over the summer. She didn't like the first time, but she was so cute to watch by the end. Lily talks very well, and quite a lot. She is very close to potty training. In fact, I think I could just train her and she would be great, but in my head she still seems so little. But, she often goes completely independently. Or, there is also the option where she will poop in her diaper and proceed to take off her diaper and put said poop into the potty to flush it. She will come tell Sam or I about her "Big poop" and usually we will have caught things quick enough it's never too bad to deal with. Other than the fact, that she takes off her diaper with a poop inside.

However, the other day, as I was doing primary work on my computer, and all the kids were upstairs playing happily. Suddenly, I hear little footsteps coming down the steps, I knew it was Lily. What was she saying. "Mom, big poop" I look up to see her, pants around her ankles waddling toward me with nothing else on. Panic. After all, she is now all the way downstairs. "Where's the big poop?!" I ask her. Hoping the answer is: In the potty. Not this time. "Right there." She turns around to show me her messy buns. I pick her up and come upon the scene of half a million wipes that she had used to remedy the situation herself all of which had varying amounts of...remnants ok, poop on it. I got her all cleaned up. 😅 Crisis averted. Then, I noticed her hands. 😆 I will say no more. My point is, she wants to do everything herself. 

Lily's first dance class

My sweet Jonah is going to preschool. He is the only kid that I feel sure about school wise. We decided to hold him back a year from kindergarten, which I am so thankful that I made that decision, and I made it early, so while I had been flip flopping all over with everyone else I knew Jonah was going to be in good hands. Jonah, lately, has improved so much! His speech, his attitude, his listening, all of it. Not to say, there aren't still moments, there are still many, but I can see a positive change. My all time favorite thing that Jonah says to me is: I like your heart. He will say it randomly at times, other times it will be when we ask him to do something he doesn't really want to do he will say, "I still love your heart, mom." Sometimes he will just say when he is going to bed. It melts mine. 

One thing I decided to do with my older boys over the summer was go through the unit of sexual reproduction and maturation before Kaj started middle school. I had intended to do the unit with Kaj last year with homeschool, but we all remember how that turned out. But, I definitely wanted to have the discussion with me before they started hearing things at school. I have never seen Josh's eyes go so wide 😂 and he proceeded to ask me, "Do you have to do that?" 😂 Oh dear! But, we got through it! 

I am feeling sad to look back through pictures and see my littles being so little. It is true what people say. It does go by fast. I didn't believe them. and most of the time I wanted to say "Promise?" Now, I just want to hold on them so tight. I hope they like me when they are older.  I hope they will still talk to me. I need to just be sure to love them and tell them every day. Even on bad days. 

 

Can I have one of those, madam

When you are so far behind on your blog, you start with something applicable. I just picked up new glasses for Rowan. (not pictured) We went for a follow up eye doctor appointment a couple weeks ago where they discovered his astigmatism has gotten worse and they strongly recommended he wear glasses. It was a bit of hard news to take in because, of course, I love Rowan's handsome face just the way it is. But, there we were, in the optometry office picking out Rowan's new face. "It's a lot of pressure." We didn't want to end up with the Gloria Vanderbilt collection, "He sold me ladies glasses!" We were there in our masks about to pick out Rowan's first pair of glasses. I thought it was pretty ridiculous to try and do this and every pair of glasses Rowan tried he would look at himself and make a stink face. He handed them back to the lady, "Thanks, but no thanks," Rowan said, "I don't think I am going to get glasses today."  😂 Oh Rowan! We love you. I then asked if we can remove his mask- there is no way I can pick glasses for my son with a mask on. Not a problem. What a weird world we live in right now. 

I was so lucky that I was able to take a trip out to Utah this for spring break. It was a trip I planned on taking regardless if Sam could join, and in the end, he couldn't get the time off. So, I bravely went with all my 5 kids and hit the road before 7 am.  We didn't quite make it to Burns when suddenly in my side mirror I see that we are losing things from the top of the car. With not much traffic but the occasional semi truck I pulled over for a team huddle but before I even said a word Kaj and Josh got out of the car and started running down the road to get the things. We lost Lily's  blankets and her scooter. But, we were traveling at a fast clip and the items we lost were a lot farther away than the boys must have thought. But, they did get them. Josh was in tears holding Lily's broken scooter. It was going to be OK. The yakima had opened slightly but I made sure it was secure, and we continued with no other issues. But, in the moment I had a hesitation if this is how the trip is starting than what else could go wrong? But, had to try. It was actually one of the most fun trips to Utah. We had a great time visiting. We loved seeing cousins and the kids were awesome. I couldn't ask for better kids. 

Sometimes.