Boys and Sand

It is starting to warm up outside it has been nice so far. This means two things: we have been hitting the park a lot more, and I got my first sunburn for the season. We go to Draper park, and there is the giant sandbox-possibly for sand volleyball? Yes, that would make the most sense. We moseyed over, and I was well aware that once we got to the sand I was in it for a the long hall. Kaj and I joined Josh and adopted the barefoot look. I have to admit there is something about being barefoot in the sand, it doesn't even have to be the sand that has a view of the ocean (which, let's be honest is the best kind), it apparently can also be a giant sandbox in the middle of a park that can do that trick. It is just nice to sink your feet into. I sat with my boys, as they dug their fingers, their faces straight into the dirt, and tried burying everything from shoes to themselves in it, and laughed. Boys. Ha! 

There has been so much going on lately, and probably even more in my head and my heart. So much that it is hard to unravel each thought. So this time...I won't try. 

But the facts are: Sam has 5 weeks left! Meaning 1 rotation left!- I am so excited! And, I know he is too. It has been hard work, and if  I can give myself some credit, for both of us. 

I have been working 2 jobs to alleviate stresses, but it turns out I don't like to be treated like garbage especially if it is in front of lots of people (ha!) and so I am down to one job as of...today.

I am very very grateful for my parents. They are kind and they are loving. And, they have opened their lives and home to us. My mom reminds me that she has really enjoyed having us there- which has been a loving reminder, and usually come at time where I start to wonder how in the way we must be.

I love my boys. I love all 3 of them. I love Kaj and Josh and the happiness they bring with just a smile. They truly do have my heart. I know that these are the people who will love me, and know that I am doing my best.

I try to be better every day. Sometimes it doesn't work. But, every once in a while at the end of the day you can give yourself a small pat on the back, because you really do feel like you were a better you. Those are good feeling days.

I love having a personal relationship with Heavenly Father. I love that I can talk to Him, and cry to Him, and know He knows me so well, and He knows best how to comfort me. A small tender mercy in just that.