Fly Away

 Sometimes I try to think about or try to remember what it was like to be a kid, to have the worries of a kid. What toy should come with me to the store? Should I get stories read to me, or should I just look at the pictures? It's a very beautiful thing. There was a moment in the day where I was sad, sad enough to be crying, mostly for the non kid worries- and before I brought my kids in from the car I looked at Kaj and smiled at him tearfully, and was relieved he didn't notice. Kaj usually will tell me when any child is crying anywhere we go if there is, in fact, a child crying. I guess he doesn't notice unless it is loud wailing cries- which I was not doing. ha! I started thinking about the lesson in relief society on Sunday,  wondering at what point do you apologize for who you are. It is a miracle that I was able to gain anything from it considering I was probably in the room for a total of 20 minutes, and interrupted, because I spent most of it out in the hall with Joshy. The topic was gifts of spirit, well, that's the part I got from it. We talked about what it was to have the gift of charity, and to pray for that gift, that it isn't enough to say "this is just in my nature, and I can't change who I am." Hence my question to myself.
So, needless to say after Sunday I have prayed every night for the spirit of charity. It has taken me awhile to learn that charity doesn't just mean being charitable, it encompasses so much more. "Charity suffereth long.." so has patience, when that was said Sunday I was like: "yeah, I could use some more of that!" Decision made: charity it is! Haha! I won't quote the scripture I am thinking of word for word (it's Moroni 7:45) but, if I could truly possess all that is the spirit of charity, I feel like there would be happiness all around. I really want to strive more fully to uplift people around me. I am grateful that I was able to catch the message that perhaps, I was supposed to hear on Sunday.