A 4 Year Old Rowan

We celebrated Rowan's 4 year birthday while we were in Utah. It was very fun to actually be with the family at this time. We had a Just Dance party and Grandma and Grandpa Jo were able to come up to Midway. We combined with 

Noel, because they share a birthday. But, it was just really fun to be surrounded by people that love Rowan. I have to recognize the fact that Rowan is really easy to love. To put it simply. What is the line? to know him is to love him. I remember hearing that line in a song years and years ago and not fully understanding it because could that really be? But, it be. 

I recall talking to Whitney after we had arrived home and she was saying that it was kind of sad to her because she didn't get to spend as much time with Rowan like she had the time before (we stayed with Whit and Justin the time prior) and she realized with him you have to be very intentional with connecting with him or else you may not connect with him at all. And, it made me so grateful for people in his life who first of all, recognize this- but, also, really want to put the time in to do so. He is definitely well worth that time. 

I have said so many times with Rowan-he is my heart. He is the boy the tugs at my heart without trying. He is infectious, endearing, and so darn lovable.

 He works really hard. I have sat beside his bed at night thinking of how hard he must've worked that day. Rowan is now up to just shy of 25 hours at ABA, and on top of that, he still has preschool and speech. I have thought about his this trial in his life. If he knew what it would be like before coming here to Earth, and he was willing to accept his mind that would always be wired a little differently. But, perhaps, it is a better world that he lives in. He is loving and accepting of people and completely free of judgements, and not to forget- happy. He is a happy little boy. He smiles easily. He has a lot of people in his corner. 

I have been told by multiple people who work with him that everyone at the office loves him. Everyone is always happy to see him, and they feel lucky to be working on his team if they get to be on his team. He is smart and such a fast learner. They have told me how quickly he was will master his programs, and how they have to constantly make sure they are keeping up with him. It is alway great to hear, but it doesn't surprise me. I am also so happy he has his brothers. Sheridan- she is the lead on his team at ABA -and I think she is so terrific, but she is often the one at the house for home sessions and the boys have been home from school a couple of times and they were jumping on the trampoline together and she was telling me how sweet the boys are with Rowan. She said the older boys were throwing the ball to each other and after recognizing that Rowan was only rolling the ball, they looked at each other, sat down, and began just rolling the ball with him. They are such good boys and they probably don't even realize how much they are learning from Rowan just by being his brother. I am sure they will one day. I sometimes wonder what it will be like to sit and have a back and forth conversation with him. I wonder what he'll ask me, and wonder if there will ever be an ease about it. I just hope when that time comes I won't ever take it for granted. 

Recently, we had to cancel a couple of his sessions, just with the boys having some time off of school and then with Sam's schedule being off Mondays and Tuesdays we wanted to make family plans. I had to let ABA (Jenny) know. And she emailed me back and said something along the lines of "I know the longer hours can be hard, but in time you will see that it will be so beneficial and you will get to enjoy family time with Rowan so much more." She believes very much in intensive therapy especially at this younger age, and I think there is definitely truth behind it, but what she was not realizing that we are going to enjoy Rowan no matter where he is at in his progress. No matter how far he has to go or how much more he has to learn, we love being around Rowan. He is an essential part of our family. 

Some things I love about him right now is how much he loves singing. He loves the song from Coco, "Remember me." He will sing all the words to the song. He loves saying, "That's not a dragon, that's a window!" He says it like a punchline to a joke. It's so great. He loves talking about going swimming. The last time he went swimming was with my mom and Aunt Bonnie when they came into town, so he correlates swimming with MorMor. He will say, "Go swimming with Mormor, it's so fun!" He sleeps in our bed every. single. night. It's not the best. But, I will say, I have awoken at 2:30ish in the morning before and wondered where he was. So, it's really a love-hate thing. It cannot go on forever. But, for now, I guess we love it. 

So, what am trying to say is: I sure do love him. I love that I am have him. I also know with clarity how much he is loved by Heavenly Father ( I wonder about myself sometimes 😂) I am just so grateful for him. I am grateful for the people in his life, because it does help to have that love and support from others. But, the love and that smile of his I don't know what life would be like if I didn't have it.